Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
