just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
