That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Randomize
