I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
