So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
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