But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Randomize
