Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
