speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Is it because I queefed?
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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