Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
