oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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