butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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