Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
