I'm eating all of the evidence.
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
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