wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
