I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
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