Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
