I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
