your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
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