Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
you traded sex for a burrito?
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize