I wish you could order shots online.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
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