I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
