i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
