I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Randomize
