Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
