i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
We need to rekindle our bromance
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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