Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
