Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
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