I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
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