lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Randomize
