I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
so much tequila, so little girl.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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