I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
