is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Randomize