windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
