im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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