you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Randomize
