watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Randomize
