i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
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