why didn't you poke me back
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
my poor anus
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Randomize
