hell yes lets make some ravioli
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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