The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
