I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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