I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Randomize
