Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
