she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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