I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
