Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
