Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
