with your own penis?
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
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