After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
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