how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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